Road Trippin' X-Force

by Binkeee

 

 


Disclaimer: Characters are Marvel's. Whoppetedo!


"We're lost." Domino stated.

"We are not lost." Cable remarked.

"Then where are we?"

"Right here."

"And where, oh mighty leader, is here?"

"I'm trying to find out."

"Were lost."

"We are not lost, I just forgot to look at the map."

"You threw it out the window about an hour ago." Tabitha happily reminded him.

"Thank you Tabitha."

"You threw the map out the window?!" Domino shouted.

"He said he was to much of a man to need it." Tabitha said in a deep voice trying to imitate Cable's.

"Shut-up Meltdown." Cable snapped.

"Just like a man to be to prideful to ask for help."

"We don't need help. I know where we are."

"So do I. We're lost."

"We are NOT lost!"

"Cable! Shatterstar keeps poking me!" Dani Moonstar whinned.

"I am not, your on my side of the line." Shatterstar pointed out.

"You moved the line!"

"I did not."

"Did to!"

"Not!"

"To!"

"Dani! Shatterstar! Shut-up or I'll turn this car around right this instant and go home!"

"You can't."

"Why not?"

"Because you don't know which way home is." Domino replied.

"We ARE NOT LOST!"

"Sure we're just taking a detour."

"Ah have to go to the bathroom!" Sam shouted from the back.

"Cross your legs, Sam."

"That will make me go in the car!"

"I'm not stopping."

"Then your goin' to have a wet van!" Sam said as he squirmed in his seat.

"Gross!" Tabitha said sticking out her tongue.

"Kids be quiet I'm trying to find out where we are."

"I thought you said we weren't lost."

"I thought you said we were."

"When did you start to listen to ME?" Domino asked waving her hands around.

"Cable! Rictor threw my miniature TV out the window!" Shatterstar screamed.

"I hate the Brady bunch!" Rictor stated looking out the window.

"Look there's a gas station lets ask them for help." Sunspot suggested.

"We don't need help, I can tell you where we are." Cable told him firmly.

"Did that sign say 'Last Hope Gas Station'?"

"Can we throw Sam out? He looks like he's about to burst!" Dani screamed as Sam held his breath.

"WHAT?" Cable and Domino asked in unison.

"He's holdin' his breathe, the lad isnae use to not gettin' ta go."

"Suck it in, Sam" Cable suggested.

"Caliban awake, why everyone screaming?"

"Go back to sleep."

"Caliban can't, friend 'Star took Caliban's pillow."

"Shatterstar give him back his pillow."

"Fine."

"So are we lost?" James asked as he switched his CD's out.

"We were never lost James."

"We're still lost!" Domino corrected.

"We are not!"

"Hey keep on your side of the seat!" Shatterstar said as Dani plastered him to the window.

"I do not want to get wet because of Sam."

"Sam you didn't..." Cable asked not wanting to hear the answer.

"Ah warned ya Cable."

"Eeeeww!" Dani squealed as Sam burst out laughing "What's so funny?"

"Great, now were lost and a bathroom on wheels." Domino shouted over Sam's hysterical laughter.

"Again, we are not lost!"

"Then why don't you know where we are?"

"I know where we are!"

"Sure you do."

"Are we there yet?" James asked.

"Ah still gotta go!" Sam whined as he threw his gum into the trash. "I just spilt muh cup and Dani started to freak out. I.GOT.TO. GO!"

"I'm hungry!"

"I have a headache."

"I'm bored."

"And we're all together lost." Domino said again after the multitudes of complaints continued.

"SHUT UP!" Cable shouted, the van automatically fell silent.

"*sniff*"

"He's making Caliban cry!" Sunspot informed.

"Your heartless man!" Dani shouted.

"Why'd you make him cry?" Sam asked.

"Caliban thought Cable was Caliban's friend!"

"I'm going to dump you all on the side of the road if I hear one more thing." Cable tried to threaten.

"But you'd still be lost, Mr. I-don't-need-a-map- Summers!" Domino shouted into his ear.

"I don't!"

"Delussional."

"We are not lost."

"I wonder were they'll find our bodies."

"We are not lost."

"We'll all be bones."

"We will not be bones."

"Well after wondering around in this desert, we won' be anything else!"

"We will not wander around in the desert."

"Sure we will, we're riding on empty."

"What?!"

"I'm not gettin' all hot and stinky because of you Cable!" Tabitha complained.

"Quiet Tabitha."

"I think I can safely say it, don't you kids?"

"Go for it Dom!"

"I. Told. You. So." Domino's grin got cocky as Cable gave her the "go to hell" look.

" hmnmph, hmmpmhsh."

"What was that?"

"I said, We wouldn't be here if you didn't force us to come."

"WHAT?!"

"Cable, do you want to die?" Teresa asked

"I didn't even--! What nerve! It was--! Your going to get it!" Domino fumed.

"Shatterstar I didn't take your M&M's I swear!" Rictor said trying to get 'Star to release his death grip on his neck.

"Cable, Rictor ate my only food supplement."

"I did not! He's just mad 'cause it melted in his pocket."

"That's not chocolate Ric..."

"I"M GOING TO HURL!" Sunspot screamed.

"I was only joking! Down 'Star!" Rictor pleaded.

"Star's choking Ric!"

"Tattle tell!" Shatterstar remarked.

"What's that smell?" James finally asked after Ric and 'Star had settled down once again.

"I don't smell--oh wait a moment eewww yuck I do what is that?" Tabitha asked waving her hand in front of her face to fan the smell away.

"Caliban sorry."

"Sick. Man I want out of this car!" Sunspot ordered.

"Who's idea was it to get lost in the desert anyway?!" Sam asked.

"We are not lost."

"Cable's idea." Domino said.

"We are not lost."

"Yes we are."

"Don't start that again!"

"Stop yelling."

"I'm not yelling. THIS IS YELLING!"

"AND SO IS THIS! WERE LOST!"

"I give up, fine were lost AND out of gas."

"I told you soooo." Domino sung out.

"GGGGrrrrrr...."

"Look there's a sign!" James pointed out.

"From God?" Tabitha asked.

"Ha ha, it says..."

"Next city THREE HUNDRED AND FIFTY MILES?!" They screamed in unison.

"Shoot me."

"Only if..."

"Can we kill Cable for gettin' us lost?" Teresa asked innocently.

"Not until he pulls over Terry."

"Is it to late to quit?"

"SHUT UP EVEYONE! WE ARE NOT LOST AND I DON"T GIVE A DAMN WHAT YOU DO!"

"Well."

"Then I guess you don't care if we kick you out and actually find where weare?"

"No I -- WE ARE NOT LOST!"

"Then where are we?"

"Ah, now don't start that again!"


I don't know why they were on the road but to all of those people that told me that Driving Lessons was too short, I hope you'll like this one ;) It was inspiration from my basketball team being stuck in a small van traveling five hours to play one lousy game!


Back to Archive