by Alicia McKenzie
Long past midnight, yet he still was wide awake. Standing alone in the dark, staring out at the lights of Genosha's capital. At his plan, realized. Even with the knowledge of how much worked remained to be done, the sight should give him some satisfaction. Some transient sense of accomplishment--something.
It should. But it didn't.
The pain hit again, awareness of anything else fleeing from the power of that anguished scream, seemingly imprinted on his mind. Forever, perhaps, he reflected dully when it had passed and he could straighten at the window, his whole body shaking in reaction.
He ran his fingers through his heavy white mane of hair with a shuddering sigh. He yearned to be able to sleep, but save for an hour here and an hour there, rest had eluded him for almost two full weeks.
Since that day.
He should be glad, Magnus reflected bleakly. With the horror his waking hours had been, sleep would undoubtedly be no escape. He had dealt with nightmares before, of course.
But, as terrible as they had been, they had at least been his own.
The memories flashed through his mind again, an inexorable loop, an eternal circle as unbreakable as hate. X-Force's lightning raid on Hammer Bay to retrieve files once belonging to the Genengineer. His decision to lead the Acolytes against them personally, both out of indignation at the intrusion and from a desire to silence, permanently, the questioning whispers about his well-being.
His casual, almost indifferent deflection of the debris from one of Meltdown's timebombs.
Seeing, out of the corner of his eye, one of the larger pieces strike Domino. A woman whose mutant ability should have saved her from such an ignominous end, altered chance to prevent the fatal impact of twisted metal against flesh.
Hearing, with his mind as well as his ears, that cry of soul-shattering agony from Cable as she fell.
The pain struck again, almost vengefully, smashing into his mind with white-hot fury as if provoked by the memory. Magnus found himself reaching forward to break the window. The ravening need to end it all raged inside him, the picture of his own shattered body lying on the ground far below suddenly the most desirable thing in the world.
The impulse faded with merciful swiftness, leaving him cold and shaking, fully aware of what had just happened. Not HIS, that desperate need to die.
Cable's.
One of the telepaths had examined him, afterwards, and explained it hesitantly, as if she were afraid of meeting the traditional fate of a messenger with bad news.
It's a psi-link of sorts, my Lord. I would--imagine that it formed more or less spontaneously, when the--woman died. Because of your proximity, and your--involvment.
Then break it! he'd ordered, appalled at the idea.
I'm sorry, my Lord, but I can't. It's too complex--it would take an alpha-level telepath to disentangle you from him, and even then, I doubt it could be done without permanent damage to your mind.
Mangus leaned forward, resting his forehead against the cool glass, fury roiling inside him. His mind had been invaded. Again.
How could this have happened, woman! Tell me that!
S-Some element of empathy, my Lord. When his link with the woman was broken, he must have reached out blindly. It's the only thing that makes sense. Something in his pain found something similar in you, and--fastened on it.
Fastened on it. Like a leech, sucking the life out of him. A snarl burst from him before he could stop it. This was intolerable! He could deal with a physical assault. He had even survived Charles's attempted mindwipe with body and soul intact.
But this wasn't anything he could fight.
He had considered breaking his agreement with the UN, going to Westchester to end this, to give Cable the release he obviously so desperately craved. To free both of them.
A simpatico consciousness, my Lord.
Absurd.
Are you pleased with yourself, Magnus? Charles may have been in the air, speeding away from Genosha when he had finally deigned to make contact, but his 'voice' had sounded as if he was in the room with him. His presence had reeked of sheer fury, a level of offense Magnus had only ever felt from him once--on Avalon, when he had torn the adamantium from Logan's body. One woman's blood on your hands to show for this day's work, and it would certainly have been far kinder to kill Cable. Do you realize that? Do you even understand what you've done? Or care?
They had attacked his people, his country. He had been defending himself, his interests.
He had provoked nothing. Cable only had himself to blame.
DOM!
Magnus felt his eyes sting, and wiped at them irritably. Even dazed by the telekinetic explosion that had hurled Acolytes and X-Force alike to the ground, the moment after that terrible scream, he had seen Cable kneeling on the ground, cradling Domino in his arms, feverish, desperate pleas spilling from his lips.
Dom--don't leave me--please--
Voght had teleported him away, to safety, almost immediately. He had watched at a distance, on the monitors, as the X-Men had arrived, reinforcements come too late. Cable's scream echoing in his mind, his nerves jangling with reflected pain, he'd seen Summers and Logan pull the dead lover from the arms of the living.
Cable had fought them all the way, until McCoy had sedated him. Covered in her blood, but refusing to let go.
#Don't go--Dom, I love you--#
Not memory. A voice in the here and now. Speaking to him, now, bringing with it more pain, more bleak, endless desolation that threatened to pull him down into a dark, endless spiral of grief. Magnus stiffened, rage cresting within him until he could feel energy crackling around him, outward expression of his emotions.
Get out of my mind, Summers! he hurled bitterly at that grieving presence lurking at the edge of his perceptions. You have NO business here! Her death is on your head, your fault!
Silence. A vague flicker of shock from that unwanted presence. A sense of sharpening, of sudden focus on the moment, rather than the pain.
Magnus felt a flicker of grim satisfaction. At least he had gotten Cable's attention, finally.
A moment later, he regretted it.
Fire exploded in his mind, white-gold like the heart of the sun, maddened with pain, hating him with every ounce of its strength. It scorched him to the core, without a trace of mercy or remorse for the pain it was causing.
#DON'T YOU THINK I KNOW THAT?#
As if from a great distance, Magnus felt his body slump to the floor. Tasted blood.
So much power. Wilder, stronger than Charles. Closer to what he had felt from the Phoenix-entity masquerading as Jean Grey, all those years ago in the Antarctic. More than enough to crush his mind, to turn it into shattered wreckage if Cable so chose.
From an ocean away.
The realization staggered him. At another time, he might have even found some amusement in the contrast between Cable now and the fool who had attacked him with a gun back on Avalon.
The tide had most definitely turned, and not in his favor.
#Don't you think I--don't you UNDERSTAND? I KNOW, you son of a flonq! Do you think I need you to tell me that her blood is on my hands too, you murdering bastard?#
Then--leave me be! Magnus sent back, forcing the thought through the pain that gripped his entire body, acid etching every nerve.
The light quivered, as if in hesitation, and then blazed hotter.
#You'd--like that, wouldn't you? To be able to add her name to your list. Just one more enemy, dead. No one important. Just one more poor fool who dared to raise her hand against the almighty flonqing MASTER OF MAGNETISM! RIGHT?#
Cable's 'voice' had risen to a scream. Each word was like a dagger, stabbing into his mind with deliberate brutality. The self-loathing was still there, but it was quickly sliding over into murderous, nearly insane anger. Magnus could feel it, through that damnable link.
#My fault! Your doing, Magneto!#
Then KILL me! Magnus raged helplessly. One or the other, Summers! He wouldn't live with another man's pain and loss, not when he had his own to mourn.
Loss he had used to make himself stronger, to steel himself for the course he had chosen to follow. Cable should do the same, rather than wallowing in his grief as if there were some virtue to it, letting it drive him to the edge of insanity.
The light shivered with contempt. #You think you know. You think you understand.#
I--do! I do, you fool! Do you think I wanted this? Magnus was surprised by the rush of regret that accompanied the words. Dangerous compassion.
#You understand NOTHING!#
Far away, his body convulsed in reaction as he was pulled down into a devastated mindscape, a dark wasteland of ruins. His feet touched down on the broken ground, and Magnus looked around wildly, taken aback by how real it felt. Lightning split the sky above, the ruins shuddered in reaction to the thunder. Was this the astral plane?
"You wish." The hissed words startled him. He whirled to see Cable standing behind him, wearing the same uniform he had been that day, dark bloodstains all down the front of it. The other man's face was twisted with grief, but tears poured down from eyes so cold, so hard, that Magnus found himself wondering if there was anything left of the soul within.
"Then where?" Magnus asked, as coolly as he could. He might not be in control of the situation, but he WOULD stay in control of himself. He wasn't a child, to be intimidated by a telepath's tricks of illusion.
"My mind," Cable snarled. "My ground. Welcome to hell, Magnus." He indicated their surroundings, a quick, sharp gesture. "Make yourself at home."
His mind. Worse than the astral plane--whatever rules existed here, they were entirely of Cable's making. Magnus hadn't fought with and lived alongside Charles for all these years without learning a little. "So you've brought me here to kill me?" he asked, indifferently, as if the answer was of no consequence. He would not show--or feel--fear. Not even if Cable killed him for his nonchalance.
"Again, Magneto--you wish." Cable took a step forward, his demeanor menacing, and Magnus glared at him stonily, determined not to acknowledge his disadvantage. Cable stopped, contempt warring with the pain on his face, just for a heartbeat. "I could so easily," he said, his voice raw. "It would be like swatting a fly. You have good shields for a non-psi, Magnus. Face-to-face, you might get me before I get you, even half-burned out as you are--" Magnus stiffened, and hateful satisfaction glimmered in Cable's tear-filled eyes. "But you have no way to block me out now. You can't fight the link, Magnus, you don't have the power."
"Is that what you intended?" Magnus grated, all his sympathy for this man receding. Toying with me, making sure I know who has the upper hand--
"What I intended?" Cable looked skyward, as if searching for an answer in the lightning. "What I INTENDED?" His left eye suddenly blazed with that familiar white-gold fire, and lightning struck not far away, a shattered pillar exploding at the impact.
#WHAT I INTENDED WAS TO LIVE THE REST OF MY LIFE WITH HER!# The words thundered in Magnus's mind, and out across the wasteland like the voice of a god. Cable's lips didn't move once. He only stared, grief and pain and hatred coming off him in waves that were almost palpable. #YOU RANT ABOUT YOUR VISION FOR MUTANTKIND, XAVIER PREACHES ABOUT HIS FLONQING DREAM--SHE WAS MY HOPE FOR THE FUTURE, MAGNUS, SHE WAS ALL THE PEACE I EVER WANTED!#
Cable's shoulders suddenly slumped, and he fell to his knees. "Damn you to hell," he whispered, his voice suddenly weary, sapped of strength. "Why am I bothering? You don't care. You turned your heart into stone a long time ago. I almost envy you."
His ears still ringing from that thunderous tirade, Magnus looked around again, realizing, for the first time, that this wasteland was an island. All around the edges, inky blackness shot with lightning lurked, waiting. It was as if this interior world was merely a fragment, drifting aimlessly through storm-tossed empty space, and Magnus swayed, dizzied at the sudden sensation of motion.
Cable looked back up at him. "All you left me," he said in that exhausted voice. "All that's left of me. Jen, Dom--two psi-links, both broken. All the best pieces of me went to the grave with them. I only wish they'd taken it all--then it wouldn't hurt this much." Cable's shoulders shook, and he laughed. "You can't sleep, can you? Neither can I. It's the pain, Magnus. I feel it every time I move, every time I breathe. Gets worse when I think of her." He doubled over, hands digging into the broken ground, and Magnus staggered, gasping at another, more intense wave of pain. Cable continued, forcing out the words in a choked voice. "Aren't you proud of your handiwork? One less mindless sheep of Xavier to trouble you--"
Breathing heavily, trying to straighten, Magnus stared down at the man huddled on the ground in front of him, a strange, imaginary lump forming in his nonexistent throat. "You never were," he whispered hoarsely. "I knew that."
"One of Chuck's followers?" Cable sat up straighter, his eyes narrowing. The pain faded slightly. "No, I'm not, am I? And he certainly wouldn't approve of this, wouldn't approve at all--"
"You're so sure he doesn't know already?"
"Ask me if I care," Cable spat, and rose, his features smoothing into a calm, almost inhuman mask. Only the look in his eyes was undisguised--and terrible in its directness. Magnus met that disturbing gaze unwaveringly, fury at this astral kidnapping warring with that reluctant, yet powerful sense of empathy. "I can't find it in me to care for much of anything these days, Magnus. But cheer up, buckethead, I'm not going to kill you." Cable took a step backwards, a dim aura of golden light slowly growing around his body. "In fact, go ahead. Run right back to your body, I won't stop you."
"You will deal with the link, first," Magnus grated, trying to hide his bafflement. What was going on here--what had Cable wanted, and gotten from this conversation, that he was now ready to send him back? It made no sense! "I cannot imagine you want this connection between us any more than I do, Summers."
Tears began to trickle down Cable's face again, but a cold, cold smile grew there as well. "True. The only person worse than you would be Apocalypse. But I've thought about this, Magnus--and the link stays."
"NO! Either kill me, or break it!" The words, coming out of his own mouth, shocked him.
Madness in those strange eyes. "No."
"It is not my pain to live with!"
"It is now." The smile turned savage, feral. "And if I have to live with it, Magnus, SO DO YOU!" Lightning struck again, and the ruins of what looked like a Grecian temple imploded.
Although he knew this place was not real, that this was not air he was breathing, Magnus found himself gasping for it, like a drowning man. "You--cannot, Summers. If I should die, linked to you--" He gestured around at the ruins of Cable's mindscape, thinking to appeal to the man's self-preservation.
"I don't have anything left that I particularly want to keep, Magnus. Die if you want, and take it all. I don't care." The light around Cable was growing, great starbursts obscuring his figure, melding into one solid pillar of flame. "And if you're thinking of hunting me down to break it by killing me, keep this in mind. If I die before you, you'll either follow me or live on as a gibbering wreck." A brutal, humorless laugh came from the nimbus of light. "Have to admit, I find that idea--appealing."
The ruins vanished around him, and Magnus felt himself being pulled roughly back to his body. The golden light followed, lingering as he pulled himself stiffly back to his feet and wiped blood away from where he'd bitten his lip.
#Live with it, Magnus. Her blood on both our souls. There isn't enough revenge in the universe to satisfy me, but I'll settle for justice.#
And then Cable was gone. Magnus straightened, staring numbly out the window at Hammer Bay, his mind trying to process the enormity of what had just happened.
The pain was still there, of course. Dimmer, for the moment, but he knew that would change. The agony of a wounded mind, a broken soul, that would stay with him for the rest of his days unless he found another telepath to undo it.
Who? Charles? Emma Frost? Jean Grey?
They wouldn't help him. Perhaps no telepath of that strength would, when they could know Cable's pain as if it was their own, when each of them could imagine themselves in his place, missing half their soul.
The World Court had once acquitted him. Charles had thought to punish him, that day on Avalon, for all the blood on his hands.
Now, he had been called to account once more. Tried, convicted and sentenced.
Justice. Or a mutual-annihilation pact.
Live with it, Cable's words echoed, and Magnus drew himself up. For now, it seemed he had no choice but to live out his sentence.
For now.
He turned away from the window, and walked into the shadows.
fin
continued in Where Anger Bleeds